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Coming soon: Our 'Top Ten' list of ways to kill a spammer, and the 'Top Ten Uses For A Dead Spammer'

Today's Use For A Dead Spammer

Suggestions that need cartoons drawn.

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Now, I don't really want you to go out and kill these morons, but you know yourself there are times when you get so mad with idiots that you would pull the switch yourself given half a chance. This t-shirt is simply a way to vent your frustrations and show your opinion. Maybe even Congress (the opposite of Progress) might get serious about the spam problem and do something about it. Like take a vacation to Hawaii to discuss the problem. But I digress.

The talk about the t-shirt lead me into discussions about funny ways to kill the spammers. This lead to an idea for a book. The idea for the book lead to an idea for two books. Two books for which you can help me write, and which I will reward you for doing so.

Here are the titles:

          "101 Ways To Kill A Spammer"
and
          "101 Uses For A Dead Spammer"

Here's how it works:
1. Send me your suggestion for an entry in one of the above books, and if I use it, you get your name giving you credit for it in the book (i.e. you get 'published' as a contributing writer.) If you send me, and I use FIVE suggestions from one person, that person gets a free copy of the book.

2. Send me a cartoon for an entry in one of the above books, and if I use it, you not only get to see it published, you get the credit AND you get a free autographed copy of the book for each cartoon I use!

Note: If two people send me the same suggestion the first one to submit it will be the one published, based upon the time and date it hits my mailbox.
If two people send me a cartoon suggesting the same way or use, I will choose which one to use. Fair is fair, and the better quality cartoon gets rewarded. I may also suggest a way to improve or change the cartoon slightly, and will let you know so you can make the changes, if you wish.

By submitting a cartoon or suggestion, you agree to the rules shown towards the bottom of the page.

The e-mail address you can send your cartoons to is shown in the graphic below:

You will need to hand-type the address into your mail as the graphic is just that - a graphic. You can't click on it.
This address will change as needed. Once the amount of spam going to that address gets to be too much, the address will change and any future e-mail to that address will be deleted without being read, so be sure to come back to this page to verify the address before you submit. (Note to spammers - we have a hardware appliance that will handle this for us, so your mail won't even reach our servers.)

To submit your suggestion, use the e-mail address shown in the graphic below:

Again, it will change as necessary.

Here are the rules:

Original content only! By submitting a cartoon or suggestion to us, you are agreeing that we may publish it, and that you are the originator of the cartoon or suggestion. You also agree that we have the non-exclusive rights to publish it in our books or other future works (such as "Volume 2", "Best of" or other compliations.) This gives you the right to have it replubished later, for example, in the New York Times or your local paper. We may require you to sign a written release. We will cover the postage both ways, if this becomes necessary. Compensation from us will consist of the credit published in the book if we use your suggestion (which we may turn into a cartoon ourselves), or if you submit a completed cartoon and we use it, you will receive both the credit and one autographed copy of the book it is used in, per cartoon used. (Send us five cartoons and we use all five, you will get five autographed copies) We are under no obligation to use your suggestions or cartoons. We will let you know our decision, however the decision may take a while as we compile and prepare the books for publicaton. We may occasionally feature a cartoon on the web page, and will publish a "top ten" list here also. Again, you will receive the credit. Very important: We will not sell, give away, or otherwise use your e-mail address for any reason other than to contact you regarding your suggestion or cartoon. We hate spam, if you haven't guessed it by now, and will never, ever stoop that low for any reason whatsoever!